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Wednesday, 10 March 2010

How to Have a Happy Love Life


When you first fall in love, it can feel like your entire life is in harmony. You feel totally connected to the other person and you want to spend every waking moment with him or her. You haven't yet noticed the other person's flaws and it's as if the sun rises and sets with this new love in your life. Unfortunately, this phase doesn't last. The newness eventually wears off as reality sets in. The good news is that with the right mindset and attitude, you can keep the magic in your relationship.

1. Decide that you are going to have happy relationship. Anything that you ever do will begins with a thought. Visualize yourself and your partner in a happy and healthy relationship.

2. Handle conflict in a loving way. Every couple has disagreements. The way you handle them will help determine the success of your relationship. Don't insist on being right. Instead, focus on understanding your partner's point of view and be a good listener. This will help keep your partner from becoming defensive and he or she will appreciate being heard.

3. Be responsible for your own happiness. Understand that it's not your partner's job to make you happy. In the early stages of your relationship, your partner may feel flattered to know that you depend on him or her for fulfillment, but after a while, they will feel drained and suffocated. True happiness comes from within. Be your own source of happiness and that will make your relationship much sweeter.

4. Don't be consumed by jealousy. This can do serious damage to a relationship. The poet Maya Angelou once said that jealousy is like salt. In small amounts, it can add spice to a relationship but too much is unhealthy.

5. Don't take your partner for granted. Remind yourself why you fell in love with this person in the first place. Focus on your partner's positive attributes and remember that no one is perfect.

Tips:
- Spend quality time alone with your partner.
- Compliment your partner.
- Be supportive of your partner.
- Don't dwell on previous disagreements. Let them stay in the past.
- Don't nag your partner.

(Source: ehow.com)

How To Forgive Your Boyfriend "Love"

It really is tough to forgive your boyfriend when they have done something to hurt you so bad. But if you really love your boyfriend you must realize that they are not perfect and they make mistakes. If they are coming back to you apologizing and making a REAL effort to get you back than why not give them a chance, because they probably really do care for you like they say and are sorry. Sometimes it’s not best to just throw away the history the two of you have built over one situation. You can forgive your boyfriend and actually build a stronger and better relationship this go around just by knowing how the correct steps to take when forgiving them. We have all been in this position where it was hard to forgive someone you care about and you are torn in forgiving them and not.

I’m here to tell you it’s turned out very good since I’ve forgiven my boyfriend and have some awesome information on how to do it the right way where it will totally turn your relationship around for the better. I was recommended this information by a friend when they seen how hurt I obviously was by losing someone I cared about but I also wanted them back but didn’t want them to believe that it was okay the way things happened. So I decided to take a look at it and was shocked by the information and It worked out exactly as it said and now our relationship is GREAT!

(Source: articlebase.com)

Thursday, 4 March 2010

How to Make a Relationship Work

1.
Decide to love. Infatuation is typically what sparks loving relationships, but the excitement fades and warm feelings diminish unless both partners make conscious efforts to uphold their companionship. Once love is established in a relationship, actively expressing love to each other will maintain and increase the loving feelings in both partners. Conversely, refraining from expressions of love allows one's devotion to dissipate. If you are aiming for a long-lasting, successful marriage, you need to commit to your partner's emotional well-being, even when it isn't easy.


2.
Communicate about anything and everything. Have deep and meaningful conversations once in a while. Discuss what's going on in your lives right now, whether social life, school life, or family life, and learn about each other's pasts and childhoods. Celebrate accomplishments, encourage goals and ambitions, and explore each other's values and beliefs. Share your deepest thoughts, needs, wishes, hopes, and dreams. Know each other inside and out.


3.
Establish trust on all levels. Mutual trust is founded in respect and loyalty toward each other. Strive to understand and respect your differences. Share and clarify your differing perspectives, and try to empathize with each other's point of view. In some cases, it is better to simply agree to have differences of opinion or your own ways of doing things. Pressuring your partner to do something that they really don't want to do, or neglecting or abusing them (whether emotionally, verbally, physically, or sexually) undermines your ability to trust and rely on one another. You should be able to trust each other in everything, keeping private your partner's innermost secrets, fears, and struggles.


4.
Support each other. Be there through the good, happy, sad, and bad times—no matter what. Be willing to provide hugs, kisses, and emotional comfort in all circumstances. If your partner resists your attempts to comfort them and declines to talk about it, you should ease off of the subject and wait until they seem to be in a better mood before returning to it. Feel like you can count on each other; be reliable and loyal, and be emotionally available when you need each other most.


5.
Be completely honest with each other. A truly emotionally intimate relationship requires open and honest communication. Keeping secrets from your partner creates a barrier between you that limits your mutual emotional trust. Honesty can be scary, but if you want your relationship to thrive, then you both need to become comfortable discussing your feelings, insecurities, and frustrations.


6.
Spend time together. Carve out date times for togetherness as a couple. Spend time talking with each other and going out on dates, and doing other relationship-building activities. Really get to know each other and build a connection between you that's strong and enduring. Make an effort to see each other (in-person) and talk on the phone maybe once a day or every few days.


7.
Spend time apart. Be independent and keep your sense of self, never losing yourself or your voice in the relationship. Don't suffocate each other. You should each continue to grow as individuals—not just as a couple. You should have your own space, too—physically and emotionally. Do your own things separately once in a while. Spend time with friends and family, and by yourself pursuing hobbies and other things. Just ensure that no other relationship or pursuit crowds out your partner from being your first priority.


8.
Settle disputes peacefully. Apologize, forgive, and make up with each other. If you threaten to break up with each other after every fight or argument, you will never really resolve anything. Take breaking up off the table. Talk through disagreements as long or as many times as it takes until the issue is resolved and both of you feel comfortable moving forward.


9.
Keep most things private between you two. When your partner shares with you and confides in you (emotionally and physically), resist the urge to disclose sensitive details to anyone without permission. You should treat it as something special, personal and private between you two, out of respect for your partner. A relationship is between two people—you and your girlfriend or boyfriend (or spouse), not anyone else. Don't involve others in intimate matters, however close you may feel to them.


10.
Make continual efforts to maintain your relationship. Work on it. Work hard at keeping it positive, upbeat, healthy, and the very best it can be. Work on it every single day. Whatever you can do to improve your relationship or make it healthier, do it! Try thinking about, and then doing, at least one thing each day that will make life a little easier, brighter, or better for your other half. By challenging yourself to do at least one nice thing for your partner every single day, you stay focused on keeping your love front and center.


11.
Be romantic. Romance is essential to have at least some of the time. Candles, candlelight, compliments, stargazing, watching the sunset or sunrise, fireworks, romantic bubblebaths, showers, and romantic dinners are good ideas. Make some things you do and some places you decide to go to on dates romantic.


12.
Remember that every person, couple, and relationship is different. Don't compare your relationship to anyone else's—not your parents or other family members, friends, coworkers, that couple whose relationship seems perfect, etc. Every couple makes their own love rules, love agreements, love habits, love routines, and so on. Just focus on you two and making your relationship the best that it can be.


13.
Show affection. Hold hands, kiss, hug, cuddle, snuggle, or wrap arms around shoulders or waists. Become close and really comfortable with each other physically and emotionally. Share every part of yourself (your heart, mind, and soul), not just your body.


14.
Remember that intensity of emotion can ebb and flow over the years. There may be times when you are less aware of your loving feelings, more into your own interests, perhaps things have even become a little routine. Those are the times to remember all the wonderful things you have done together, and still want to do. You choose to feel committed and close, so when you feel yourself drifting or taking your love for granted, plan a romantic date night, do something special for your love, and just remind yourself of all the wonderful qualities he or she possesses that made you fall in love in the first place.

15.
See family as one, not two. Include each other in decisions. One's worry is the other's, because both will be affected by it.

(Source: wikihow.com)